Preparing for Flexibility, Fun, and Family Connection
Lane Sisak, M.Ed., CAGS
Spring break travel sounds dreamy in theory. When it’s cold, slushy, and dreary in the wintertime, who isn’t dreaming of a relaxing escape full of family fun and memories? Yet the reality of travel isn’t always what it’s cracked up to be. Along with excitement, there’s also overstimulation, new food, a change in routine, and unexpected bumps along the way. For families of Complex Learners, travel can be both fun and a full nervous-system workout.
As a classroom teacher at Wolf, I understand how important it is to plan ahead while also staying flexible. Complex Learners often benefit from outside support to enhance their executive function skills, implement self-regulatory strategies, and advocate for their needs. Being prepared means having your tickets ready, supplies organized and a solid plan in place; however, travel always comes with unexpected changes. It is important to keep in mind that even if you are the most organized and prepared, there will be times when you will need to be ready to use your flexible brain and use strategies to regulate your entire travel party (that includes you)!
The good news is that preparation goes a long way, and you can help your Complex Learner feel ready for some Spring Break fun!
Before The Trip:
Starting early helps take the edge off big transitions. Travel days can be especially challenging for Complex Learners. There are inflexible schedules to follow as we all know planes wait for no one. Along the way, there are new places, unfamiliar sounds, different smells, and many unexpected moments. While travel can be exciting, it can also feel overwhelming. Just like unexpected changes in the classroom like a new visitor or a change in our day-to-day schedule, it’s best to prepare ahead of time while also staying flexible and ready to adjust as needed. In short, by giving your child some time to mentally prepare and be ready, you’re giving them a chance to adapt to the plan and succeed!
To help reduce anxiety, talk about the trip ahead of time, involve them in the planning, and try to make the experience as predictable as you can. Helping your child pack, laying out outfits for each day, and packing the suitcase together may take longer, but it builds understanding and ownership. In the future, you will be very glad you did this!
Visual supports can be especially helpful when preparing for travel. A visual calendar showing when the trip starts and ends, a countdown to departure, or a simple visual social story can help your child understand what’s coming. Social stories can outline when the trip will begin and end, who is going, how you’ll be traveling, where you’ll be staying, and what you might do while you’re there. For many neurodivergent learners, seeing the plan makes it feel far less overwhelming. During your trip, this is also something you can refer back to. You can start your day each morning by reviewing what the plan is for that specific day.
When planning your days, remember that rest is not wasted time. Building in break days, whether that’s a pool day, a movie day, or a “we are doing nothing, and that is the plan” day, helps everyone’s nervous system reset. A recovery day at the end of vacation can also make the transition back to school and routines much smoother. Slow days often lead to better memories than packed itineraries.
Bonus Tip: Don’t be afraid to involve your child in the packing! Come up with a list together of must-have items like sunscreen and sneakers, and comfort items. This can help build independence and excitement for the trip!
Travel Days:
Travel days themselves can be the hardest. Whenever possible, try to keep routines somewhat familiar and avoid extreme schedule disruptions. Even with all the preplanning, travel doesn’t work out that way! If an early flight or a long travel day is unavoidable, just be sure to plan intentional downtime afterward to regroup (for the whole family!). If flying is new for your child, preparing them for the airport experience ahead of time can make a big difference. Along with a social story, some airports even offer TSA practice runs or family lanes, which can help ease anxiety and reduce wait times.
Bonus Tip – Check out TSA PreCheck – it can be a lifesaver!
While you’re waiting to board your flight or dealing with a potential delay, there are ways to keep your child engaged. Try giving your child an “airport job.” Assign them tasks like finding water fountains to refill water bottles, spotting the gate, locating restrooms, or even finding the nearest Dunkin’. Turning the airport into a scavenger hunt often works better than simply asking a child to wait patiently.
Packing for the plane or long car ride deserves special attention. Sitting still is hard, so bringing favorite snacks, comfort items, and fidgets can help. A “secret bag” filled with new or rarely used items (like coloring supplies, small games, or LEGOs) can be a lifesaver. If your child uses technology, be sure to download shows or apps ahead of time and avoid relying on airplane Wi-Fi. Visual supports, during travel, such as a checklist, social stories, or a “time left” visual (for any activity), can also be very grounding.
On Vacation Time:
Once you arrive at your destination, don’t give in to the pressure to go, go, go! Take it slow, it is a vacation after all! Identify some quiet spaces where you’re staying, build some buffer time into your days, and remember that it’s always better to have a regulated child than to rush through everything.
Be mindful to ensure that basic needs like food and sleep are being met. If your child is a picky eater or relies on familiar foods (yes, even chicken nuggets), planning ahead can prevent unnecessary stress. Keeping bedtime routines as consistent as possible, even if bedtime is later, can help maintain comfort and a sense of safety.
When traveling, there are new things to see, new foods to try, and new adventures to be had. You know your child best. While it’s wonderful to explore and try new experiences, sometimes vacation is not the best time for everything new. Not every battle needs a boarding pass. Assess the situation, consider your child’s limits, and stay flexible. Try focusing on one planned “challenge” a day. Make sure to clearly lay out the plan, preview it ahead of time, and support it with a social story. A little preparation paired with flexibility can make new experiences feel exciting instead of overwhelming.
Most importantly, remember that vacation is meant to be a reset, not a checklist. Enjoy your family and the time you have together. Make the trip work for you. What vacation looks like for your family may look very different from someone else’s, and that’s okay. There is no right or wrong way to vacation. If everyone feels supported, regulated, and cared for, you’ve done it right.
Heading Home:
After vacation, allowing for a buffer day at home in a familiar, comfortable environment can help everyone reset before jumping back into routines. This is also a great time to reflect together on how the trip went. Think about what worked, what didn’t, and what you might do differently next time. Talk with your child about their favorite part of the vacation and anything that felt tricky. Maybe routines were adjusted in ways that helped, but maybe you’ll learn a valuable lesson for your next trip. Even if challenges or meltdowns happened (by the grown-ups or kids), quick recovery and moments of genuine joy, connection, or discovery are signs the trip worked. Ultimately, a successful vacation isn’t one without stress, but one that offers growth, learning, and strengthened family bonds.
Since reflection is just as important as preparation, let’s ask ourselves some of the following questions after our next trip to see what travel tips work for your family and where there is still room for growth!
Let’s Review!
- Prep Early: Future You Will Be Grateful
Did preparation reduce surprises and help your child feel in control?
- Visual Supports: Because Brains Love a Preview
Did visuals help your child anticipate what was coming and stay regulated?
- Plan Break Days: Yes, On Purpose
Did break days help everyone reset and prevent overload? After our travel day, both there and back, did having some downtime help us all to reset?
- Travel Day: Same Routine, Different Location
Did planning and supports make travel days smoother? What helped for certain changes that couldn’t be avoided (early flight, delay, etc.)?
- Give Your Child an “Airport Job”
Did airport jobs reduce anxiety and keep your child engaged?
- What to Pack for the Plane: The Survival Kit
Did having your child help pack build independence? Did we have comfort items to help reduce stress and bring some familiarity to the trip?
- While on Vacation: Slow Is Fast
Did slowing down reduce stress and help your child enjoy the trip?
- Food, Sleep, and Comfort Still Matter
Did maintaining these routines help your child feel safe and regulated?
- The Most Important Part
Did we have a memorable, enjoyable time together as a family?
There is no right or wrong way to vacation! Vacation is a reset, not a checklist. Focus on connection, fun, and what works for your family.
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